This Week News & Views (Aug 26-Sept 1)

By Rick Kaempfer




*New Orleans has a baby boom
NEW ORLEANS, Louisiana -- Nine months after Katrina, the city of New Orleans experienced a baby boom. The city's birthrate increased 39% from May 2005 to May 2006.
=This is what happens when the local, state, and federal government all take turns screwing you.
=How much do you want to bet that not one of the babies was named "George"?


*Woman tries to teach dog to drive
BEIJING, China -- (AP) -- A woman in Hohho, the capital of China's inner Mongolia region, attempted to give her dog a driving lesson, the official Xinhua New Agency said Monday. They didn't make it far before crashing into another car.
=Which is exactly what the dog was trying to do.
=In fairness to the woman, although the dog was only 4, that's 28 in dog years.
=The dog was charged with speeding, failing to obey traffic signals, and leaving a deposit at the scene of the crime.


*John Mark Karr isn't the killer
BOULDER, Colorado -- After DNA evidence proved that John Mark Karr isn't JonBenet Ramsey's killer, Boulder police exonerated him this week.
=He'll have to drop the middle name now. That's reserved for notorious killers.
(Photo Credit: AP)


*Barbara Bach breaks her leg
LONDON, England -- (AP) -- Barbara Bach, a former Bond girl and wife of ex-Beatle Ringo Starr, broke her leg after being kicked by a horse, a hospital official said.
=She was humanely "put down" in the ambulance.


*Radio Shack fires employees via e-mail
FORT WORTH, Texas -- (AP) -- Radio Shack Corp. notified about 400 workers by e-mail that they were being dismissed immediately as part of planned job cuts. Shares of Radio Shack rose 29 cents a share after the news was released.
=And pundits can't understand why people aren't more impressed that the stock market is booming.


*S.S. Minnow for sale
PARKSVILLE, British Columbia -- (AP) -- One of the four boats used as the SS Minnow on the 1960s sitcom "Gilligan's Island" is for sale. The twin-diesel 36-foot mahogany Wheeler Express Cruiser was used during the second season of the show, and sells for $89,400.
=Fearless crew not included.
=Sounds like a perfect gift for a millionaire and his wife...or a movie star...


*Women use more words than men
SAN FRANCISCO, California -- According to a new book, "The Female Brain," men only use about 7000 words a day, while women use 20,000.
=Imagine how much worse it would be if women elminated use of the "silent treatment."


*Ken Starr's latest case: Bong Hits 4 Jesus
JUNEAU, Alaska -- (AP) -- Former Whitewater special counsel Kenneth Starr petitioned the U.S. Supreme Court to take up Alaska's "Bong Hits 4 Jesus" case, a dispute involving a high school student, a banner, and a tough school policy. Starr is arguing on behalf of the school district which lost the case because the student wasn't even on school grounds when he held up the banner.
=Starr is calling for an investigation of the kid's sex life.


*Trump's Apprentice sidekick is fired
NEW YORK -- (New York Post) -- CAROLYN KEPCHER, Donald Trump's co-star on "The Apprentice," has heard him say "You're fired!" for the last time - because this time he said it to her. The icy, 36-year-old blonde - who was running the Trump National Golf Club in Briarcliff in Westchester and helping supervise the Trump National in Bedminster, N.J. - was let go earlier this week because fame "went to her head."
=Whereas Trump's fame just went to his hair.



FUN WITH VIDEO & AUDIO

VIDEO: CNN anchor Kyra Phillips' bathroom conversation goes over the air by mistake

VIDEO: Desperate roommates

VIDEO: Jon Stewart & Stephen Colbert at the Emmys

VIDEO: Classic Beatles video: "Rain"

VIDEO: Campaign song for candidate in Minnesota

AUDIO: 32 Homer Simpson d'ohs

VIDEO: Hercubush




READER RESPONSE

Regarding "Steve & Garry notebook"

"Thanks for the walk down memory lane.....wow, well done, putting Bridget #1. That's a hell of a short list of shows. Though I feel the list is lacking due to an omission of a "Corn-holers" segment. I'm sure that's an unintentional oversight. Oh, by the way, when I got "snipped" a few years ago, I did remember the S&G show, but I was lucky enough not to have someone talking to me about it DURING the procedure. That had to be really weird."
--M

"I have been enjoying your blog. I have laughed abundantly--especially the little tykes home takeover. However, today you actually made me cry when I read your thanks to Mary Ann. I look forward to your blog every day. I don't think that reflect the patheticness (sp?) of my life, but the richness of your writing."
--J

"Thanks for Steve & Garry notebook. It was great to read and view. I really enjoyed it. Check this out too: Roman Sawczak/Gary Tribune Article"
--Roman

Rick responds: Check out the link. It's a great article about a fellow former Steve & Garry producer, my predecessor Roman Sawczak. Roman trained me for the job, and on my first day, he sent me into the studio to ask Steve & Garry for a phone number...while they were on the air. When I came back out of the studio after getting a vicious tongue-lashing, Roman was laughing so hard, he was holding his stomach. Despite this practical joke (which I admit is funny in retrospect), Roman and I became friends.


Regarding "Suburban Man: A Wal-Mart Primer"

"Wait a minute, why aren't there any profanities in the letter from Tom Serritella? I've never heard him speak without them."
--J

"I can't believe you didn't have the stones to reprint my letter without edits."
--Tom S.

Rick responds: I guess I'm just a *#(&@ *@(@!.



Regarding Half Empty: "9 ways to attract a man"

"It's about time somebody pointed that out! Giving women extra tricks to attract men is like giving men tips to discover their libido."
--C

"I don't mean to quibble with your list, but a pulse isn't always necessary. Call me inclusive, but that's the way I see it."
--D



An International Shout-Out

I've been a little surprised at the international flavor of the readers to this blog. Since I began in January, I've heard from people in the following places...
Argentina
Australia
Belgium
Brazil
Canada
Chile
Columbia
Czech Republic
Denmark
Egypt
England
Finland
France
Germany
Greece
Guatemala
Hong Kong
India
Indonesia
Israel
Italy
Japan
Jordan
Korea
Macau
Malaysia
Mexico
Netherlands
Norway
Peru
Poland
Portugal
Romania
Russia
Saudi Arabia
Scotland
Senegal
Serbia & Montenegro
Singapore
South Africa
Spain
Sweden
Switzerland
Taiwan
Thailand
Trinidad & Tobago
Turkey
United States (all 50 states)
Wales

I guess it really is the world wide web. Thanks for checking out blog. I greatly appreciate it.