Coming this weekend

I've had a bit of a rough week because the kids are home for spring break, so I haven't had time to do a Chicago Radio Spotlight interview. That will return a week from Saturday. (I'm actually conducting that interview later today, but there's no way I'll be able to whip it into shape by tomorrow morning).

I will, however, be posting my latest Father Knows Nothing column. This week's column will be called "Extreme Lent Bites Back."

Have a great weekend!

Man Begs Dog

I just posted this week's guest column to Kim Strickland's A City Mom blog at Chicago Now. It's one of my typically understated classy contributions...about my dog eating her own poop.

You can read it here.

Going where no man has gone before

Playing the Star Trek theme on a saw...

Cubs roster decisions likely coming today

So says the Chicago Sun Times.

Among the people on the bubble: Andrew Cashner (starter or reliever), Carlos Silva (long reliever, starter or out of here), Reed Johnson (5th outfielder), Fernando Perez (5th outfielder), Augie Ojeda (utility, minors, or DL?), Darwin Barney (platoon 2B, utility, or minors), Blake DeWitt (platoon 2B or minors), Scotty Moore (platoon 2B or minors), and Bobby Scales (platoon 2B, utility or minors).

Should be interesting.

The Cars

Love this new one by the Cars. Great video too. Good to hear them again after all these years.

Jokes for a Monday morning

Contributed by "AH," who of course, is not blonde...




DISNEYLAND
Two blondes were going to Disneyland . They were driving on the Interstate when they saw the sign that said "Disneyland LEFT." They started crying and turned around and went home.


CAR TROUBLE
A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.

She says, 'What's the story?'

He replies, 'Just crap in the carburetor'

She asks, 'How often do I have to do that?'


AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE
A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.

'Impossible!' says the doctor.. 'Show me.'

The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream.

The doctor said, 'You're not really a redhead, are you?

'Well, no' she said, 'I'm actually a blonde.'

'I thought so,' the doctor said, 'Your finger is broken.'


KNITTING
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting!

Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, 'PULL OVER!'

'NO!' the blonde yelled back, 'IT'S A SCARF!'


IN A VACUUM
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night... It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, 'If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?' She thought for a time and then asked, 'Is it on or off?'


TIMING
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend said, 'Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?' 'HELLLOOOOOOO......,' answered the blonde. 'They're watch dogs'!

First Day of Spring

The boys are home for spring break all week, so I may not be able to post quite as often this week.

We've got some exciting things planned: haircuts, dentist appointments, and several fistfights.

Father Knows Nothing

This week's Father Knows Nothing column has been posted. It's an update about how "Extreme Lent" has been going for me.

You can read it here.