Saturday, January 30, 2010

Chicago Radio Spotlight

I just posted a new Chicago Radio Spotlight interview. This week I spoke with Fresh-FM morning man Steve Fisher.

You can read the entire interview here.

Friday, January 29, 2010

Zambrano & Carrey

According to the Chicago Tribune, Cubs pitcher Carlos Zambrano said he would like to work with Jim Carrey someday. I contributed to this piece in the Beachwood Reporter speculating on what that might look like.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

E-mails, we get e-mails...

It's always nice to get feedback about my books. This came into my e-mail box this morning.

Good morning Mr Kaempfer,

Just a quick email to introduce myself...I work for a music producer from Australia..He has a 2 hrs weekly show (pre-recorded) and it is syndicated in 20 countries worldwide so far.

My job is helping the producer and organising the content of the show. As I am very young (24) and new to this job (we are a team of 3 people and we just started in October), everything is a discovery.

I wanted to tell you that I've purchased your book 'The Radio Producers Handbook' and I am finding it brilliant, very inspiring and full of material. So I wanted to thank you for that!

I will email you again once I finish the book.

Best regards,

Oprah's poop

Oprah and Alicia Silverstone talk about their poop.

I kid you not.

(Video at the link...of the discussion, not the poop)

We are the World

25 years ago today...

Poems for a Thursday morning

Contributed by "BP"...


Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's rich and self-employed,
And when I spend, won't be annoyed.
Pull out my chair and hold my hand.
Massage my feet and help me stand.
Oh send a king to make me queen.
A man who loves to cook and clean.
I pray this man will love no other..
And relish visits with my mother.


I pray for a deaf-mute gymnast nymphomaniac with
big t*** who owns a bar on a golf course,
and loves to send me fishing and drinking.
This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a s***

Order those World Series tickets now

Xavier Nady

Chad Tracey


Chan Ho Park? (that's the rumor...not a done deal yet)

Well, you have to give Jim Hendry credit. He did say that the Cubs weren't going to make a big free agent splash this year. He has been true to his word.

Chuck Swirsky

He is now the radio voice of the Chicago Bulls, but back in the dark, dark days of the early 1980s, Chuck Swirsky had a little run-in with the Chicago Cubs.

Read all about that here.

The Swirsk turns 56 this weekend.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Off the Couch

The latest issue of NWI Parent just arrived in the mail. As always, I wrote the back page "Family Room" essay for the issue.

This one is called "Off the Couch," and it's about the impersonation of me that led our entire family to have a healthier summer.

You can read it here.

Andre's an Expo

I find it difficult to quibble with the reasoning behind the announcement that Andre Dawson will enter the Hall of Fame as an Expo.

We loved him in Chicago too, but let's face it, he played in Montreal for ten years and those really were his best years (despite the MVP with the Cubs.)

The full story is here.

It's cold, but it's not this cold...

Antarctica is a whole different ballgame...

The Throw In

On this date in 1982 the Cubs made one of the best trades in their history. They swapped shortstops...Ivan DeJesus of the Cubs went to Philadelphia in exchange for Phillies starting shortstop Larry Bowa.

Oh, and the Phillies threw in a minor league second baseman too. (Photo)

He became a Hall of Famer.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Paul Newman

He would have been 84 years old today. This is from 1959...

Ernie's advice for Sammy

Ernie Banks to Sammy: Time to come clean.

The story is here.

Ernie thinks Cubs fans will forgive Sammy if he fesses up. I think Ernie is right. Many will probably forgive him. Cardinals fans have already forgiven McGwire. He just got a standing ovation at the Cardinals convention.

E-mails, we get e-mails...

This came in from "RP", and it made me feel better. He also has three sons (and they are grown up now). He was responding to this week's Father Knows Nothing column about my son Tommy's current dislike of his dear old dad. He writes...

"Yes, it hurts. And you have yet two more.

Hold on to one thing you wrote: 'He still calls this the best week of his life.'

Still. Even now. As he tries to push you away with both hands.

He will come back to you as a man. I promise."

Thanks, RP. That does make me feel better. I hope you're right.

Jack Brickhouse

Former Chicago Cubs announcer Jack Brickhouse was born this week in 1916. Good old Jack was the Cubs announcer during their darkest days, including the 20-year streak of finishing in the second division (1946-1966). He retired after the 1981 season.

Needless to say, his favorite Cubs player was Ernie Banks. He explains why in this video.

Monday, January 25, 2010

Very Mary Kate

Very Mary-Kate, Episode 1 from Mary-Kate Olsen on Vimeo.

The value of a Catholic Education and a #2 pencil

Contributed by "MR" (a Catholic) and posted by me (another Catholic)...

Little Susie was not the best student in Catholic School. Usually she slept through the class.

One day her teacher, a Nun, called on her while she was sleeping.

'Tell me Susie, who created the universe?'

When Susie didn't stir, little Johnny who was her friend sitting behind her, took his pencil and jabbed her in the rear.

'God Almighty!' shouted Susie.

The Nun said, 'Very good' and continued teaching her class.

A little later the Nun asked Susie, 'Who is our Lord and Savior?'

But Susie didn't stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to her rescue and stuck her in the butt.

'Jesus Christ!!!' shouted Susie.

And the Nun once again said, 'Very good,' and Susie fell back asleep

The Nun asked her a third question...'What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?'

Again, Johnny came to the rescue. This time Susie jumped up and shouted, 'If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I'll break it in half!'

The nun fainted.

40 years ago today...

...this movie was released. Needless to say, it was a little raunchier than the TV series, as this trailer makes clear...

Phil Collins

25 years ago this week Phil Collins released his huge hit album "No Jacket Required."

Did you know the title of that album was based on something that happened to him in Chicago? That story is here.

It's a little easier to understand than this song from that album. I still don't understand what it's about 25 years later.

Wish Fulfillment

What if Wile Coyote actually caught the roadrunner. What would happen to him?

(Warning: Not suitable for workplace, there are a few swears.)

Road Runner Funny Clip - The most amazing home videos are here

Hymie Weiss

This ugly mug was born on this day in 1898. He was shot to death just 28 years later, right in front of the Holy Name Cathedral.

Read all about this notorious North Side Chicago gangster here.

He may not be our proudest member of the fraternity, but Hymie Weiss was a Cubs fan.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Father Knows Nothing

I just posted my latest Father Knows Nothing column at NWI Parent. It's called "The Father-Son Roller Coaster" and it's about the arc of the father-son relationship.

You can read it here.