Monday, November 07, 2011

Pee Wee

From Bob Dearborn's The Olde Disc Jockey's Almanac this morning...

"November 7, 1991…Actor Paul Reubens, who performs as "Pee Wee Herman," pled no contest to charges of indecent exposure. Reubens had been arrested for exposing himself in a Sarasota, Florida theater."

Twenty years later Pee Wee still hasn't fully recovered his career. That doesn't seem right to me. There are sitting Congressmen and United States Senators who have done worse, and have been re-elected.

As the Rupert Turns

On this morning's episode we discover that the former editor of the phone hacking newspaper in London was given $2.7 million, a chauffeur, and an office, and this was after she was arrested by British police.

All part of Rupert's renewed promise to emphasize integrity.

How Far Would You Go To Get A Scoop?

This Australian reporter won the scoop of the year, but in order to get it, he had to agree to circumcision.

"Um, fellas, when you said you had a tip, I assumed it wasn't going to be mine."

RIP Andy Rooney

Andy Rooney passed away over the weekend, and 60 Minutes said farewell to him last night...

Radio Hall of Fame

Tom Taylor's column at Radio-Info.com this morning has all the highlights from this past weekend's Radio Hall of Fame induction ceremony. Larry King was the MC, and told the following story from the dais...

"At age 24 Larry got his break – a chance to do the all-night show. It wasn’t a powerful station, but Larry could feel the energy from the listeners that first night and it was everything he wanted – capped by a thrilling phone call from a woman who said, literally, “I want you.” Like a good radio guy, Larry improvised. Larry told the woman he’d come over when he got off at 6am. But she said she had to leave for work at 6am. He then told WAHR listeners “we have a real treat for you tonight – the live Carnegie Hall performance of the great Harry Belafonte,” or words to that effect. He hopped into his VW and drove 8-10 blocks to the woman’s house. The front door was open. She was inside, waiting. He dived into her arms and it was bliss. But she’d kept the radio on – and Larry heard that the record was stuck, playing the same groove over and over again. He told the National Radio Hall of Fame crowd that it was "a moral dilemma." But he rushed back to the station, where found all the phones ringing. One elderly man said he couldn’t change the station, because he was an invalid and there was no overnight help available. Larry asked “what can I do for you?” He said “Play Hava Nagila.” Larry did. Management never found out about the Harry Belafonte screwup, and Larry kept his job and eventually moved on to a more powerful station in Miami."

Bill Kurtis Day

Today is Bill Kurtis Day in Chicago, by official proclamation.

You've got to love Bill Kurtis. I met him several times over the years and he was always gracious and polite, but there's a side to him that not many people see. One morning we had him on the John Landecker show. He showed up around 6:30 in the morning wearing a yellow suit, and proceeded to tell some incredible stories about hanging out backstage with the Rolling Stones. Try to imagine him dressed like Huggy Bear talking in perfect journalistic cadence about the rock and roll decadence of Keith Richard. Truly a once in a lifetime experience.

Enjoy your day, Bill. You deserve it.

The 1945 World Series


A ChicagoNow blogger remembers the 1945 World Series.

He was there.

Sunday, November 06, 2011

Father Knows Nothing

My latest Father Knows Nothing column is entitled "Inexplicable Basketball".

You can read it here.

Friday, November 04, 2011

Mike Tyson Quotes Put To Music

This is hilarious and inspired, although not suitable for work...

Goldline Charged with Fraud

Details are here.

I'm sure Goldline's celebrity endorsers Glenn Beck, Laura Ingraham, and Mark Levin are preparing their "it's a liberal conspiracy" defense as I write this, but as someone with a pretty good radar for scams, to me, this one was a flashing red light the very first time I heard about it. I'm not declaring Goldline's guilt or innocence, but let's just say that they wouldn't want me on the jury.

As the Rupert Turns

On this morning's episode, Scotland Yard arrests another person in the phone hacking case. This one is arrested for bribery/corruption.

Also, News Corp announces a compensation plan for hacking victims. I know they're doing this to try to mitigate the damage (by avoiding attorney fees), and it's probably a good plan. On Thursday, British police said they had identified 5,795 potential victims of phone hacking, and that the number could still rise.

Paid to Tweet

The latest trend in advertising is paying celebrities to endorse products via twitter. According to this article, Lindsay Lohan was recently paid $3500 for one tweet.

I just want to let the advertisers of the world know that I'm officially available to tweet for cash. If you'd like to reach more than fifty middle-age-ish people (that's right 50+ baby), I'm your man.

I have some standards when it comes to my writing, but for my tweets...zippo. Bring on the green.

Cory Provus

Former Cubs announcer Cory Provus is leaving the Brewers to become the play by play man for the Minnesota Twins.

Details are here.

Boston or Chicago

Which managerial opening is more attractive, Boston or Chicago?

Two ESPN writers debate the subject.

There's also a video at the link of the PTI guys debating it. They both agree that the Cardinals opening is better than both of the others.

Thursday, November 03, 2011

Gypsies, Tramps & Thieves

Exactly 40 years ago today, this was the #1 song in America. Dig Cher's hairstyle...

As the Rupert Turns

On this morning's episode, we find out that the Murdoch's are in family counseling over the tricky subject of succession (when Dad finally kicks it).

For those of you that think my description of Rupert's life as a soap opera (the inspiration for the title of this feature) is unfair, read this Vanity Fair article. The way he pits his children against each other and secretly undermines them is truly amazing.

I challenge anyone to find a family with more dysfunction at the junction. It's positively Shakespearean.

Chris Matthews

Chris Matthews has a new book out about his hero, John F. Kennedy. Say what you want about Matthews as a TV talk show host (for instance, he's incredibly insulting sometimes, and he interrupts everyone all the time), but you can't say he's not a good writer. He takes it very seriously...it's his true passion.

A writer for Forbes found that out yesterday when he asked Matthews if he employed a ghost writer on this book.

Chris Matthews said a very bad word to him.

A Positive Sign?

I thought I read this story incorrectly this morning, but no, I didn't. A group of 40 Republican lawmakers signed a letter along with 60 Democrats urging the Super-Committee to consider raising revenue. Those Republicans, by the way, had signed that stupid Grover Norquist no-tax-hike pledge.

You read that correctly. I double checked.

Can I allow myself to hope that the American people might have actually gotten the attention of Congress?

When Radio Becomes Part of the News

The Herman Cain sexual harrassment story has been in the news lately, but yesterday one person in radio inserted himself into the story. A talk show host in Iowa said that Cain was inappropriate to his female staffers when Cain appeared on his show.

He's a conservative talk show host, by the way. I looked it up because I was wondering. Does it make me cynical that I now check on the political affiliation of people in the news before deciding whether or not they have ulterior motives?

Law Pushed to Handcuff FCC

The one thing the F.C.C. does to positively influence American society is exercising their power to limit mergers in the media world. Granted, they don't exert that influence enough, but at least we know that if something truly egregious occurs (and there will be examples in the coming years...it's getting bad again), the F.C.C. can step in.

Republicans proposed a law yesterday to take that power away from the F.C.C.

Really? Is there anyone in the entire country in favor of that other than the five or six owners of the giant media conglomerates?

What about the rest of the 299,999,994 of us?

Somebody should really write a book about this. (Oh wait, that's right, somebody did.)

Wednesday, November 02, 2011

Quade is out


And Ryno will not be his replacement.

The details are here.

THURSDAY UPDATE: Apparently Theo also spoke to Ryno, letting him know the Cubs won't be considering him for the position. That had to be an awkward call.

Things That Lasted Longer Than Kim Kardasian's Marriage

This list is pretty funny.

My favorite? Kim Kardasian's marriage: 72 days. Number of days "The Macarena" was the #1 song in the country: 98 days.

The Theo Trio

This is the brain trust of the new Chicago Cubs. I'm calling them "The Theo Trio". Chicago Cubs president of baseball operations Theo Epstein, center, and new general manager Jed Hoyer, right, and new head of scouting and player development Jason McLeod, during a news conference yesterday in Chicago.

I'm willing to give these guys a chance.

AP PHOTO/CHARLES REX ARBOGAST

America's Top Newspapers

The latest circulation figures were released yesterday, and here are the top newspapers in the country.

1. Wall Street Journal
2. USA Today
3. The New York Times

No surprises there. I suspect that no matter what happens in the future to this fragile business, one form or another of those three papers listed above will remain a part of the equation. So will the Washington Post.

The rest of the country's newspapers? Not so sure.

Spamming a Spammer

This week's Suburban Dad column on the City Mom blog at ChicagoNow is entitled "Spamming a Spammer" and it's about my buddy Dave's e-mail correspondence with a Nigerian spam artist.

Have you ever wondered what would happen if you actually answered those ridiculous e-mails they send requesting your bank account information?

Wonder no longer.

As the Rupert Turns

On this morning's episode, Parliament reveals they have a smoking gun that implicates James Murdoch in the phone hacking scandal.

It's not looking good for Rupert's boy. Especially since he explicitly testified (under oath) to these very same people that he didn't know anything.

The "Super" Committee

Yesterday former White House chief of staff Erskine Bowles (Democrat) and former Senator Alan Simpson (Republican) testified to the super-committee about what obviously needs to be done to resolve the huge debt problem.

You need to raise revenue, and you need to cut spending.

Everybody in the country knows this. It's a big gigantic DUH. Only the most strident (and clueless) partisans on both sides think that only doing one (revenues or taxes) will take care of the problem. But, of course, the Republicans won't raise revenue and the Democrats won't cut spending until Republicans agree to raise taxes, so...guess what? They're deadlocked.

The approval rate for Congress right now is 9%. 9%!

Fellas, listen. The overwhelming majority of Americans (something like 70% in all the polls I've seen) are perfectly willing to accept a slight raising of taxes (even Republicans) and cutting of benefits (even Democrats) because we know we're in a crisis situation here. This isn't even controversial.

You can't possibly be that cowardly (or stupid), can you?

Tuesday, November 01, 2011

Eckhartz Press

An exciting new publisher based in Chicago is readying their first book for publication later this month. The publisher is called "Eckhartz Press".

Details about the publishing company and their first book (and some of the other books already in the pipeline) will be coming soon, but here's an explanation of the company's name. The name is a combination of two names; Eckhard and Fritz. Those were the first names of the co-owners' fathers, Eckhard Kaempfer and Fritz Stern.

The laughing "E" in the logo might give you an indication of the kind of books that will most interest Eckhartz Press.

Jimmy Kimmel

This should be interesting.

Jimmy Kimmel has been tapped to host the White House Correspondent's Dinner this year.

Tribune Bankruptcy Not Resolved After All

The Tribune bankruptcy has literally been in court for three years, and now it looks like it's going to be in court even longer. The judge in the case rejected both reorganization plans presented (one by JP Morgan, and the other by Aurelius).

From Bloomberg this morning: "U.S. Bankruptcy Judge Kevin J. Carey in Wilmington, Delaware, compared two groups of competing creditors to warring animals in a parable about a fox and scorpion who must cooperate to cross a river safely. They fail and both die reflecting “an inescapable facet of human character: the willingness to visit harm upon others, even at one’s own peril,” Carey said in the opening section of his 125-page legal decision yesterday."

Rush Explains Racism

Yesterday on his radio show Rush Limbaugh said that because the media is reporting Herman Cain had sexual harrassment complaints filed against him, they are engaging in an 'Unconscionable, Racially Stereotypical Attack'.

Before you criticize him for that statement, you should realize that Rush may very well be an expert on this subject. He is, after all, the man that said: "The left is upset with Obama because white people are not shining the shoes of black people" and that Rep. Jim Clybourn is running for the position of "Driving Miss Nancy".

He knows an unconscionable racially stereotypical attack when he hears one.

Hitler's Stationery

A very cool story about a letter written by an American soldier to his three year old son on V-E day. It was written on Adolf Hitler's personal stationery, and it was written by a man that would go on to run the CIA one day.

Full details are here.

Zombie Backlash

Who could have known this would be taken the wrong way? A GOP chairman from a county in Virginia sent out an e-mail with among other things, a picture of Obama as a Zombie with a bullet hole in his head. Needless to say, he was forced to apologize. I got a kick out of the apology...

“Apparently, some individuals have interpreted an image of Barack Obama that appeared within the e-mail as intending to portray the president as a victim of a violent crime. Nothing could be further from the truth, and we deeply and sincerely apologize to the president and anyone who viewed the image if that was the impression that was left."

What is happening to this politically correct country when you can't even innocently portray the president with a bullet hole in his head anymore without somebody misinterpreting it? Presidents who receive record numbers of death threats can be so sensitive.

Wouldn't you have loved to be there for the secret service visit?

"What, oh, the bullet hole? Wow, now that you mention it, yikes, I guess that could be taken another way. We simply drew that on there because zombies often have bullet holes in their heads, and we wanted it to be totally authentic."

CEO Explains Bloodbath

Bob Pittman is the CEO of Clear Channel, the company that laid off hundreds of employees across the country last week. He tells Radio Ink this week that the cause and intent of the layoffs has been widely misinterpreted by the media. Here's the actual reason, according to Pittman.

"What it came down to was the determination that small and medium markets were just putting out some bad radio."

That is just shocking reasoning.

It's like Major League Baseball shutting down the entire minor league system because the players aren't as good as the big leaguers. Of course they aren't as good, but if you shut them down you have no hope of getting big leaguers in the future. That's already a problem, and it's obvious to anyone that listens to the radio.

But no, they are "improving the product" (another actual quote from article) with these massive layoffs. It's a wonder they can get that kind of crap out of their mouths without choking.

Danny Bonaduce

When his station in Philly changed formats, Danny Bonaduce was out of a job. That is no longer the case. He's moving to Seattle, because he was just named morning host at KZOK there.

Forever Lazy

My friend "BP" sent me this link with the tag line: "This is why the terrorists hate us".

I must agree. No other country in the world would produce this product.

The Cubs in Vegas

I'm as optimistic as anyone about the Cubs future, but really, the Cubs won't win the World Series in 2012. Who are these people betting on them in Vegas? The odds at MGM are only 25-1.