Wednesday, June 14, 2006
Half Empty: 10 Things a Husband Can Say to Make His Wife Laugh
They say that when you hit your 40s, your life is half over. We prefer to think of it as HALF EMPTY. Our age has finally caught up with our outlook on life. Remember, it is possible to turn that frown upside down...but you might pull a muscle.
10 THINGS A HUSBAND CAN SAY TO MAKE HIS WIFE LAUGH
By Rick Kaempfer & Dave Stern
The following is the natural comedic arc of a relationship between a man and a woman.
1. She falls in love with you because you make her laugh.
2. She marries you.
3. She begins to roll her eyes.
4. She begs you not to tell a joke again.
5. She intentionally ruins your punch lines at cocktail parties.
6. She only loves you when you're serious.
7. She says "When will you grow up?"
Don’t feel bad if the above seven step process describes you perfectly. It happens to every man after a few years of marriage. When a wife gets to know her husband a little better, he becomes less and less funny. If you talked to Jerry Seinfeld’s wife she would say the same thing.
It's really not her fault. You tell the same jokes. By the third year of your marriage she's heard every single one of them. Plus, now she's hearing those jokes from the guy who leaves his dirty socks on the floor even though he's constantly being asked to "pick up those disgusting socks."
It's inevitable. No one is to blame. It's the way God planned it.
So what can a man (who was chosen as a husband primarily because of his ability to amuse) do to keep his wife laughing? Between the two of us we have thirty years of marital experience, and even more comedy writing experience. Unfortunately, here is the comprehensive list of things a husband (of more than a few years) can say to his wife to make her laugh.
So is that it? Your wife is never going to laugh again? Sure she will. She just won't laugh at anything you say. She will get a huge laugh, however, out of the following ten pictures. All women think these are hysterically funny. Show them to her, and bask in the nearby laughter.
She's laughing, isn't she? No charge.
If you missed any previous HALF EMPTY columns, click here: http://halfemptyarchive.blogspot.com