By Rick Kaempfer
I was driving my son Sean to pre-school this week, when he casually dropped this little nugget.
“Dad,” he asked, “What do you call it when one person loves someone, but the other person doesn’t love them back?”
I looked in the rear view mirror to see the expression on his face. He really looked concerned.
“There isn’t really a word for it,” I said. “Why? Do you love someone?”
“No,” he said. “But someone loves me.”
I was intrigued. I knew the conversation would have ended right then and there if I didn’t proceed with caution. If I joked with him at all, I wouldn’t get another morsel. I gingerly continued my line of questioning.
“Who loves you?” I asked.
“Jennifer,” he said.
“How do you know she loves you?”
He sighed, and looked out the window.
“She always follows me around,” he said.
“But you do that to your brothers,” I pointed out.
“She always wants to do stuff for me,” he said. His tone of voice was saying “Geez, Dad, you just don’t understand women, do you?”
“But you like to do stuff for your brothers,” I said. “Maybe she just loves you like a brother.”
“Trust me, Dad. This is different. She doesn’t love me. She loves me.”
I wish I could have taken a picture of that expression on his face. He was a (5-year-old) man with girl troubles, and he didn’t know what to do.
“You mean like a girlfriend loves you?”
“Uh huh.”
We drove in silence for a few moments, and I struggled not to laugh or smile.
“Why does she love you so much?” I asked.
“Because I’m cute,” he said.
I couldn’t be the serious confidante for one second longer. The real me popped right out.
“Did you ever think about asking her to marry you?” I asked.
“DAAAAAD! I’m way too young.”
“What’s old enough to get married?”
“You have to be old. Like you and mom.”
I shook off that little shot to the gut, and queried on.
“But why don’t you love her back?” I asked.
He didn’t say anything for a few moments while he pondered that question. He sighed once more.
“I need my space,” he said.
When we arrived at preschool about two minutes later, Jennifer was the first person we saw. Her whole face lit up when she spotted Sean. She started waving frantically.
“Hi Sean!” she screamed.
He looked at me and rolled his eyes.
This originally appeared on my blog at NWI Parent, "Father Knows Nothing." If you haven't yet checked out "Father Knows Nothing", there are several new columns there that I haven't shared here at Suburban Man headquarters.Click here to see them.
