Every Monday stop by for jokes, links to stories you might have missed, amusing photos and video, and more. Contributions and suggestions are welcome and encouraged. Click on the "Email Me" link on the right to contribute.
Joke of the Week: In honor of Mother's Day, "P" sent me this list. Shame on you "P".
Yo Mama's so stupid she thought Taco Bell was a Mexican phone company
Yo Mama's so stupid I asked her to buy me a pare of sneakers and she came back with 2 candy bars.
Yo Mama's so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes.
Yo Mama's so stupid when I said drinks are on the house she went and fetched a ladder.
Yo Mama's so stupid that she got run over by a parked car.
Yo Mama's so stupid that when she goes to a movie theatre and saw under 18 not admitted, she went home and got 17 of her friends.
Yo Mama's so stupid she stayed in the grocery store for one day looking at a can of orange juice because it said concentrate.
Yo Mama's so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund
Yo Mama's so stupid she tried to kill herself by jumping out of the basement window
Yo Mama's so stupid that when the computer says press any key to continue, she looks for the any key
Stories you might have missed
1. Man asks court to change his name to 'In God We Trust'
(How would you alphabetize that? Under "I" or "T"?)
2. Top Ten Outrageous Comments by John McCain's spiritual advisors
(And this doesn't include what McCain himself called his wife.)
3. Top Ten Surprising Facts about Obama
(My favorite is: When I tell my kids to clean their room, I finish with, “I’m Barack Obama and I approved this message.”)
4. Drinking Dampens Ability to Feel Fear
(Thanks to "B" for sending me this link, with the accompanying observation: "In related news, smoking pot gives people the munchies")
5. Father of LSD dies
(Just say no to drugs, kids. He died at the tragically young age of 102.)
Video of the week: Contributed by "J". Hillary vs. the Coffee Machine
Picture of the week: Thanks to "M" for contributing this. She calls it "This will hurt."
Reader Response
Regarding Suburban Man "That Tone of Voice"
"This is an important reminder. Thanks!"
--M
"I’m glad to know I’m not the only parent who does this, but I’m still ashamed nonetheless. I sometimes forget what it must sound like to my child when I talk to her like that. I admire your patience and will try to emulate it!"
--J
"I really enjoyed your Suburban Man. Your kids are lucky."
--R
260 days until we get a new president.
