Every Monday stop by for jokes, links to stories you might have missed, amusing photos and video, and more. Contributions and suggestions are welcome and encouraged. Click on the "Email Me" link on the right to contribute.
Joke of the Week: Contributed by "M" Another Hillary Joke.
Rick's note: Hey you Obama and/or McCain fans, let's get going with some jokes about the current candidates. I get a dozen or more Hillary jokes a day. (I thought this one wasn't too bad.)
A man was washed up on a beach after a terrible shipwreck. Only a sheep and a sheepdog were washed up with him. After looking around, he realized that they were stranded on a deserted island.
After being there awhile, he got into the habit of taking his two animal companions to the beach every evening to watch the sunset.
One particular evening, the sky was a fiery red with beautiful cirrus clouds, the breeze was warm and gentle - a perfect night for romance. As they sat there, the sheep started looking better and better to the lonely man. Soon, he leaned over to the sheep and put his arm around it. But the sheepdog, ever protective of the sheep, growled fiercely until the man took his arm from around the sheep.
After that, the three of them continued to enjoy the sunsets together, but there was no more cuddling.
A few weeks passed by and, lo and behold, there was another shipwreck.
The only survivor was Hillary Clinton.
That evening, the man brought Hillary to the evening beach ritual. It was another beautiful evening - red sky, cirrus clouds, a warm and gentle breeze - perfect for a night of romance. Pretty soon, the man started to get 'those feelings' again..
He fought the urges as long as he could but he finally gave in and leaned over to Hillary and told her he hadn't had sex for months. Hillary batted her eyelashes and asked if there was anything she could do for him.
He said, 'Would you mind taking the dog for a walk?”
Stories you might have missed
1. Black Magic Men and the Cubbie Triangle
(This is a great article about the various possible curses afflicting the Cubs. Not sure if I can pronounce the name of the writer...is it Ka-empfer? Hmmm. I think the 'a' is silent.)
2. The Jack Brickhouse Eating Tour
(This is done by the same writer as #1. There's something about him that I like.)
3. Married to Christie Brinkley, but spending $3000 a month on porn
($3000 a month on porn? That's Pee-Wee Herman-esque.)
4. Worst Restaurant Idea ever
(It's called "Buns & Guns" and it tries to make you feel like you're in a war. Oh, and it's located in Beirut. And I'm not kidding.)
5. Roger Clemens can't spell
(The Smoking Gun posted some e-mail exchanges between Clemens and his accuser, and I'm recommending an immediate push to convince Rocket to go back to school for his GED.)
Video of the week: Contributed by "B". Joe Cocker at Woodstock with subtitles. This is hilarious.
Photo of the week: Contributed by "R"
READER RESPONSE
Sorry...there were a lot of e-mails this week...
Regarding my vacation
"I didn't even realize that I had started reading your stuff every day until you weren't there last week. Good to have you back."
--G
Regarding Just One Bad Century
"You have three sons. I can't believe you don't understand the psychology of the Sox fan. It's like the psychology of the little brother, feeling they never measure up to the Golden Boy, son number one. They feel kicked and spat upon, disrespected. The Sox are the number two team in a two team town. They know this. They have deep-seated inferiority issues. Winning--and the Cubs losing--are the only ways they can attempt to prove their superiority. However, this is not enough. They are painfully aware that even if you do not win, you still have superior inherent value. They do not understand why. They cannot stand the Cubs "having it all" by getting this unearned adoration AND winning, too. Can't help but notice that there were brooms being swept with much more glee on Sunday after the Cubs sweep than the usual sweep brings. It seems the older brother also takes the opportunity to rub it in his brother's face. Sibling rivalry. It works both ways."
--R
"Hi there. I heard a song on the radio saturday morning early based off of the tune "I would walk 500 miles, and I would walk 500 more" written by you guys I think about the cubs. "I would wait 100 years, but I won't wait even one more", or something like that. Great song..Is it on your website and I missed it? If not please post on website, or tell me how I can get a copy..Thanks!"
--J
Rick responds: We're working on a video, but here is the song in audio form for now: We Can Wait 100 Years
"I have 4yr old twins who are very into Cubs baseball, and we have a question. They heard that the rally cap was "invented" by the Detroit Tigers players during the 1945 WS in which the Cubs were outscored. So now they yell at the tv when they see Cubs' fans wearing a rally cap. What's your take on this?"
--D
Rick responds: I answered this on my JOBC Blog. Thanks for the heads up. I hadn't that before.
Regarding my tribute to Sandy Stahl
"What a beautiful, touching tribute, Rick. Thanks so much for writing it."
--R
"I read your beautiful write-up about Sandy Stahl. She sure sounds like a great person. I wish I would have met her. I'm truly sorry for the loss of such a great person in your life."
--C
"Hey, nice piece on Sandy. I was shocked. I thought of her often, I didn't know where she was. What a wonderful person. She was rare in "the biz". Hope you are well. Again, nice job."
--R
"What a story. Well, I guess everyone was mentored by Sandy at some point..even me, and I never worked at the same station that she did. Thanks for your column."
--M
"Thanks for writing your Sandy tribute! I've been in shock since I heard the news. Selfishly I was wishing we could all get together to talk since it's such a hard thing to process. Usually when this kind of thing happens, being together makes it easier, but of course all the LOOP people are spread out and many I haven't spoken to in years (unlike you have). This weekend has just served to remind me how much I miss everyone. Thanks again for sharing your Sandy story. Happy Fourth!!"
--D
"I just read your post about Sandy Stahl. Whew. I am in tears...at work. Thanks for sharing your story. I didn't know her at all, but it made me think of the few people in my life that inspired me and helped me make the necessary steps. Great job."
--J
Regarding The Radio Producer's Handbook
"I am emailing to say THANK YOU for writing The Radio Producer's Handbook. I have jut finished reading it and it has been such a valuable and interesting book. The advice and wisdom coupled with the wit and realism made for such a brilliant read. I am only 22, but was given a break doing production on one of the UK's largest network shows (Graham Torrington's Late Night Love) last year and have had nine months of working alongside a full time job learning production. Unfortunately, a fortnight ago the show was axed under new owners and so I have lost the job. However, my partner found and bought your book for me and I have read and it has totally filled me with a new desire to make sure I continue producing great radio. It must be one of the most exciting jobs there is - I get such a thrill from it, so just hope it's only a matter of time before I get some more work! I am tempted to put '...have read The Radio Producer's Handbook' on my CV - it must count for something! So, thank you so much for writing the book. I am sure thousands of people like me have benefited tremendously from it, and from your experience. I would be very grateful if you could pass this email onto John Swanson, as he seems to be much more illusive than yourself! Cheers - and have a good summer!"--T
