Today is officially the 15th anniversary of my first novel's release. It was called $everance. It's still available at ENC Press.
Not to be confused with the recent series on Apple TV. This was the story of the original $everance...
Tom Zagorski was one of the most popular morning radio personalities in Chicago for nearly twenty years, but the financial realities of the new corporate-owned media world make him obsolete. His boss is doing whatever he can (including public and private humiliation) to make Zagorski quit so he doesn’t have to pay the severance. Zagorski pushes back by passive-aggressively needling his boss into firing him — without ever crossing the line that could get him fired for cause.
When neither side budges after six months of battle, an exasperated Zagorski sends an e-mail to the CEO of the corporation, sarcastically suggesting a massive firing of anyone who doesn’t actually bring in money. Instead of firing Zagorski in a rage, CEO takes the e-mail at face value, eliminating thousands of jobs and sending the stock price soaring. To reward the genius who came up with the idea, the CEO makes Zagorski his new COO.
Getting fired suddenly becomes a monumental task: Zagorski has become the darling of Wall Street. In order to get fired, he has to get the stock price to go down and/or irritate his mercurial boss so much that he can’t take him any longer. Zagorski takes great glee in pursuing both of these options, and, along with his on-air partner Richard Lawrence, plunges headlong into the world of media finance, politics, and personalities.
Still very proud of this one.
It was particularly appreciated by people in the media who knew what I was writing about...
"Rick cuts the modern media conglomerates to the quick in his alternately hilarious and disturbing Severance. Some readers will think his moguls and media personalities are exagerrated. I'm here to tell you they're pretty dead-on."
--Roe Conn, WLS Radio
"It's about time somebody told this story. $everance certainly captured the world of radio, warts and all."
--Legendary broadcaster Clark Weber
“Severance is a black comedy that would be funnier if its darkness weren’t so true. And it crackles with the insights and cynicism that made Network and Broadcast News the seminal cinematic treatments of today’s dumbed-down news business. Move over Christopher Buckley----Rick Kaempfer is in town!”
--ABC-TV News Reporter Andy Shaw
"Other than 'love', 'Severance' is the sweetest word in the English language. This really made me laugh."
--WGN Radio's Steve Cochran
"Told with the keen insight of a veteran insider, it's a humorous indictment of an industry that has lost all sense of purpose -- except for making money, of course."
--Former Chicago Sun Times media columnist Robert Feder
"A hysterical critique of corporate morality"
--Chicago Tribune's RedEye Columnist and WGN-TV Morning News Anchor Larry Potash
"I was with it the whole way, and I love the appended real life figures at the end. I enjoyed the hell out of $everance."
--The Beachwood Reporter's Steve Rhodes
"Brilliant satire! I got a paper cut from the sarcasm. I wish I could say it was great fiction, but having worked in radio, I think it’s just really funny non-fiction. The reality in between the laughs will scare the hell out of you."
--Longtime radio personality and playwright Spike Manton
"I thought this novel was just going to be an amusing story about radio. But the way Kaempfer has woven in elements of all media and politics is masterful, to say nothing of insightful, and frequently laugh-out-loud funny! It’s a brilliant first entry. I can't wait for his next page-turner!"
--Legendary broadcaster and programmer Bob Dearborn
"$everance is a comical, suspenseful, thought-provoking novel about the frightening realities of corporate media in America. Kaempfer writes with ease, quickly drawing the reader in to the satirical-yet oddly realistic-world he's created. This one is tough to put down-a delightful page-turner!"
--Julia Perla, Managing Editor, Shore Magazine
"Too bad Zagorski (the main character) is fictional. Today's media could use someone like him to shake things up. He's the personification of fairness with just enough wicked cynicism to make him completely irresistible. The thought that a team like Zagorski and Lawrence might actually exist should make some big bosses more than a little uneasy."
--Leslie Keiling, WGN Radio
"Rick Kaempfer’s “$everence” is whiplash-fast, choke-on-your-coffee funny, and ultimately frightening. Kaempfer has seen it all in the radio business, and has some dire predictions for the rest of the media, too. It’s the summer’s must-discuss beach read – and probably a sign of the apocalypse."
--Paige Wiser, Chicago Sun-Times columnist
"I laughed out loud many times while reading it - yeah, it's that funny! If you work in the radio business you'll love the inside view of the industry and if you're not in the media you will certainly learn a lot of eye-opening trade secrets."
--Cara Carriveau
"I began laughing almost immediately! The first paragraph alone made me feel like I was back at my first radio job trying to avoid doing anything remotely near the station’s break room! I absolutely LOVE the book! The plot twists and turns were totally unpredictable!"
--Darren Marlar, "Marlar in the Morning", 101-QFL
"As funny as this book is, $everance is a must read for anyone who cares about the state of radio and the media in general. The more ridiculous the plot gets, the more one realizes that it's probably the closest to the truth about what comes out of our radios, tvs and newspapers every day! Kaempfer has done his homework and manages to weave a delightful tale questioning the terrifying possibilities of truth for sale."
---Jeanne Ashley, Star 102 KCKC, Kansas City
"Richard Kaempfer has peeled the lid off your favorite radio station and shown what's inside. $everance turns the radio business on its head and makes you laugh out loud, but it also asks some tough questions. A great read!"
--Reed Pence, Media Tracks
"Got this book and read it in one sitting. Fantastic. I'm realizing that I worked with - and for - most of the characters in this book!"
--Len O'Kelly, WFGR Morning Host
"It's a ripe satire that rips the media giants a new one. Kaempfer throws his rocks with a keen insight."
--Jeff Hoover, WGN-TV Morning News
"Rick Kaempfer's novel Severance reveals the scary truth about the state of our media industry today. In a country where the First Amendment and the Fourth Estate were created specifically to keep our government in check, Severance is a must read for anyone who listens to the radio, watches TV or reads the newspaper—and who cares about the information they’re being fed. This is an extremely important book, one the mainstream media doesn’t want you to know about!"
--Kim Strickland, author of "Wish Club"
"A fast moving read that gives the reader insight into the fast moving radio industry; Kaempfer folds the reality of the business with the ridiculous...which is more often than not, the reality of the business!"
--Andi Kuhn, longtime radio personality
"Severance may be a novel – but the storyline it presents is a very realistic – albeit extreme look at the corporate media world – written as only an industry insider could do."
--Dan Kelley, longtime radio programmer
Here are several more from regular readers.
When it first came out, John Records Landecker even interviewed me about it in the pages of Shore Magazine. You can read that interview here.
I wrote about it for the Illinois Enterainter on the 10th anniversary.
Sadly, most of the things I predicted would happen (as satire) have happened. Even more sadly, in the case of political media, I wasn't savage enough. Reality has gone beyond satire. I still think it's the best thing I've ever written. But that's just my opinion.
I wish it had gained a bigger audience, but after my round of local media appearances (who embraced it), I realized that the national media would never give me a platform to point out how corrupt they were. At the time, my family was also struggling financially (I had recently left the business permanently, and was working as a free-lance writer), so this was the extent of my advertising budget. It was highly mobile, but it turns out, it wasn't too effective...
