Cubs Convention

Who will be appearing at the Cubs Convention this weekend? It's a long list...




Current Players
Scott Baker
Darwin Barney
Michael Bowden
Shawn Camp
Tony Campana
Welington Castillo
Starlin Castro
Steve Clevenger
David DeJesus
Scott Feldman
Matt Garza
Brett Jackson
Edwin Jackson
Carlos Marmol
Dioner Navarro
Brooks Raley
Anthony Rizzo
Chris Rusin
James Russell
Jeff Samardzija
Dave Sappelt
Nate Schierholtz
Alfonso Soriano
Ian Stewart
Josh Vitters
Travis Wood

Minor League Players
Javier Baez
Dallas Beeler
Jae-Hoon Ha
Marcus Hatley
Barret Loux
Trey McNutt
Hector Rondon
Zac Rosscup
Nick Struck
Matt Szczur
Logan Watkins
Robert Whitenack
Tony Zych

Team Executives
Tom Ricketts
Laura Ricketts
Pete Ricketts
Todd Ricketts
Theo Epstein
Crane Kenney

Baseball Staff/Broadcasters
Jed Hoyer
Jason McLeod
Randy Bush
Shiraz Rehman
Joe Bohringer
Brandon Hyde
Dale Sveum
Dave McKay
Lester Strode
Rob Deer
Chris Bosio
Jamie Quirk
David Bell
James Rowson
Pat Hughes
Len Kasper
Jim Deshaies
Judd Sirott

Former Players
Ernie Banks
Glenn Beckert
Jose Cardenal
Jody Davis
Bob Dernier
Jeff Fassero
Randy Hundley
Fergie Jenkins
Jay Johnstone
Jon Lieber
Gary Matthews
Keith Moreland
Dave Otto
Milt Pappas
Scott Sanderson
Lee Smith
Tim Stoddard
Rick Sutcliffe
Steve Trout
Todd Walker
Kerry Wood
Billy Williams

Downsizing Remote Buttons

Here's a sentence I've never written before: Bravo Comcast!

Their new remote now features far fewer buttons than the previous one.

It's still not enough to get me to return to Comcast, but it's a step in the right direction.

Response Ad

Funny or Die does a nice response ad to the ridiculous NRA ad using Obama's children...

NRA - Stand and Fight Parody - watch more funny videos

Karl Rove

Remember when Fox News temporarily kept Karl Rove off the air because he had been so unbelievably dreadfully wrong about everything he predicted during the 2012 election? They've apparently gotten over it. They just signed up for four more years of wrong.

Dick Morris' deal can't be far behind.

Lance Armstrong

In case you missed the video of his big confession on Oprah's show, you can see part of it here. He admits quite a bit, including being a general overall jerk to everyone, and suing so many people he can't even remember all of them. And of course, being guilty of everything everyone always suspected he was guilty of doing.

Time Roughs Up Presidents

The Washington Post has an article about how the job of president has aged the people who hold that office. You can see that it's already aged Obama, and he still has four more years to go.

Heart of the Country

From Reuters...

Former Beatle Paul McCartney has recorded a new version of his 1971 song "Heart Of The Country," and directed fans to YouTube where the song accompanies an animated clip featuring his late wife Linda.

Sumner Redstone

The Sumner Redstone "just in case there is an afterlife" tour continues. He has just donated $10 million to the USC School of Cinematic Arts. Of course, he insisted they name the new building after him, but he's getting there.

For those who think I'm being a little harsh on Sumner, read his autobiography. Seriously. The man in his own words, published by his own publishing company, with no filter.

I'm not being too harsh on him.

Cara Jepsen

The media writer for the Illinios Entertainer, Cara Jepsen, is stepping down after writing about the local media scene for the past twenty years. Robert Feder has a nice piece about her today. In the piece he mentions me as a possible replacement for her. Very interesting.

The Pope's Hot Secretary

This sounds like the beginning of a joke, doesn't it? According to the Italian press, and today's Daily Mail, lthe Pope does indeed have a hot private secretary.

He's a guy, of course. He looks like George Clooney.

Chelsea Handler

Is Chelsea Handler in trouble for making Matt Lauer and Al Roker jokes? (E! and NBC are both owned by Comcast). If you believe the New York Post, she is.

As someone who once got called on the carpet by his corporate bosses for making fun of Survivor (True story--got a call from CBS in New York), I'm guessing that the New York Post may be onto something here. (Even a broken clock is correct twice a day)

Comcast seems to be verrrrrry sensitive about that whole Matt Lauer/Ann Curry story, which also leads me to believe that it's true. I have no proof, of course, it's just an educated guess.

Today's Best Tweets

Here are some tweets that caught my eye today...




Ben White ‏@morningmoneyben
Who among us hasn't had a fake Internet girlfriend die forcing our athletic director into a bizarre prime time news conference? #glasshouses

Michael Tomasky ‏@mtomasky
Thousands of decent young men play college football, get their degrees, live good lives, don't invent fake girlfriends or beat up real ones.

Rob Hart ‏@RobHart1980
There was never a Manti Te'o. His real name is Warren and he lives in Bensenville.

Brian LaPorte ‏@blaporte79
Notre Dame - killing student photographers, covering up rapes, and creating fake girlfriends since 1842 @mullyhanley

Jan Weber ‏@GermanBearsFan
@mullyhanley With the Teo story, Bears PR department could be afraid no journalists will show up today, cause they all went to South Bend.

Buster Olney ‏@Buster_ESPN
The only story as crazy as this Te'o story I can remember was the Nancy Kerrigan/Tonya Harding saga--each detail stranger than one before it

DL Hughley ‏@RealDlHughley
the very ppl who insisted on changing the voter ID laws tho there were very few cases of fraud don't feel the same about background checks?

Michael Cooper ‏@coopnytimes
As Obama calls for background checks of all gun buyers, a new NYT/CBS poll find 9 in 10 gun owners favor it: http://nyti.ms/XcdQdw

Scary Mommy ‏@ScaryMommy
Three Year Olds Are The Same as Asshole Bosses. They really, really are! http://shar.es/4QsmJ from @BPMbadassmama

Jim Gaffigan ‏@JimGaffigan
I’m not fat, I have a child bearing stomach.

Jon Stewart versus the NRA

A very thorough takedown of the pro-gun lobby...

The Daily Show
Get More: Daily Show Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,The Daily Show on Facebook

The World Baseball Classic

I enjoyed watching the World Baseball Classic last time around (I believe it was 2009). It was fun watching professional baseball players representing their countries, although there were always some strange exceptions made. For instance, I seem to recall that Mike Piazza once represented Italy.

Anthony Rizzo is doing the same thing this year, even though his family has been in this country for three generations. (His great grandfather came from Sicily.) To be fair, that was after the Cubs last won the World Series.

The WBC will be in March.

The Bad Boy Radio Trial

Here's the latest news about the Todd Schnitt-Bubba the Love Sponge defamation trial in Tampa via Tom Taylor's NOW newsletter...

Yesterday’s action began with defendant Bubba the Love Sponge Clem as the first witness, called by plaintiff Todd Schnitt. Schnitt’s attorney went right to the audiotape. The first clip, says WTSP, features Bubba calling Schnitt’s wife, then a lawyer in the state attorney’s office, a “whore.” The TV station observes that Bubba “is clearly more comfortable in his own studios where he gets to call the shots, than having to take the stand in court, where he was peppered with questions and accusations.” Todd Schnitt and his wife filed suit in 2008, when Todd was “MJ” on the WFLZ (93.3) morning show and Bubba had recently returned from broadcast exile to do wakeups at Cox-owned WHPT (102.5). Bubba’s attorney outlined what’s likely to be a theme of the defense – that far from having his reputation harmed, Schnitt’s ratings rose, and that he’d called Bubba’s act “a clown show,” suggesting it shouldn’t be taken seriously.

It's airing on television and streaming on the radio in Tampa.

What is the line for the NRA?

Pure genius from The Onion.


NRA Fights Legislation That Would Ban Gun Sales To Those Currently On Killing Sprees

Te'o!

Manti Te'o is in trouble. Granted, Deadspin is the website that fell for JOBC's Waitle Nex Yeare birth announcement and reported it as a real story when we placed that ad a few years ago, but I think they might be right about this fake dead girlfriend story.

It looks pretty bad.

This could get very embarrassing for him--life-ruining embarrassing. It will be hard to watch. I hope his version of the story (which is bad enough) is true. If it isn't, oh boy.

The Motor City Pig Vomit

Remember Kevin Metheney? He was nicknamed Pig Vomit by Howard Stern when they worked together at WNBC in New York in the 1980s. (He was played by Paul Giamatti in the Howard Stern movie "Private Parts") He was brought to Chicago to "fix" WGN during the unfortunate Randy Michaels era, and was reviled by the staff here for his abrasive style. (WGN still hasn't quite recovered)

Yesterday Kevin Metheney was hired to program WJR in Detroit.

Deadly Double-Ds

Here's the headline: Woman Accused Of Using Her Breasts To Smother And Kill Boyfriend

I will keep you abreast of the investigation, that's what bosom buddies do, but I simply refuse to milk this story for laughs. If mammory serves, dark-comedy knockers and I make a perfect pair during a tragedy like this, because we know that tragedy plus time equals comedy, and that's true all over the globes. In the meantime, we will absolutely refuse to open up the fun bags.

You can hold me to that.

Today's Best Tweets

Here are some tweets that caught my eye today...




Miles Kahn ‏@mileskahn
I enjoy DL's rants almost as much as my own. Check out @RealDlHughley on guns here: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dl-hugley/gun-rights_b_2472929.html?utm_hp_ref=black-

The New York Times ‏@nytimes
Read the White House Gun Proposal summary, fact sheet and list of executive actions http://nyti.ms/V8gkPK

daveweigel ‏@daveweigel
Who will break it to Twitter that removing a POTUS from office requires 67 Senate votes? :(

Nicholas Kristof ‏@NickKristof
I'm one person who comes from Gun Country (rural Oregon) who strongly supports Obama gun measures.

LOLGOP ‏@LOLGOP
"It's invasive to do background checks!" -- the guys who demanded 13 birth certificates from the president

Niala ‏@NialaBoodhoo
#Obama calls for universal background checks on gun purchases, to applause of audience.

Dan Bernstein ‏@dan_bernstein
Big day for Marc Trestman tomorrow. Here's what he should (and shouldn't) do at his unveiling. Column: http://cbsloc.al/UQrnI0 #Bears

Gawker ‏@Gawker
Undergrad's shockingly honest internship cover letter lands him more job offers than he can accept http://gaw.kr/WfRgl3s

Roger Ebert ‏@ebertchicago
The humor—and searing honesty—of Smart Ass Cripple. http://bit.ly/UsrfAb

Eddie Volkman ‏@EddieVolkman
My wife hates that I can't order Girl Scout Cookies without yelling, "Samoans! Do The Humpty Dance!"