Spike Manton is a stand up comedian, a sports radio host (formerly of "The Spike & Harry Show" on AM 1000 in Chicago), a radio sidekick/comedian (formerly with "The Steve Dahl Show" on WCKG), a radio host (formerly co-host of "The Morning Loop Guys" on WLUP), and a playwright (co-writer of the award-winning play "Leaving Iowa"). For more info about his play, check out www.leavingiowa.com
He's also a big Bears fan. But I'll let him tell you the rest of the story...
"Defending the Couchfan"
I am absolutely out of my head excited about the Bears game this weekend. My 9 year old son, Mickey, and my 7 year old daughter Samantha have been making plans all week about the game. Alright, mostly Mickey, but we’re bringing Samantha along as fast as we can. We are Bears fans in our house. At least, I thought we were.
But according to conversations I had and overheard ad nauseum this week, I am not actually a Bears fan at all because I won’t be at the game. This is a sentiment that seems to rear its misdirected head whenever the “Big Game” is upon us. It is a time when true fandom is only measured by how much you have paid for your seat, or how naked you are willing to be in 10 degree weather. Now, I’m not attacking the faithful that go to the game. Well, yes I am. But, I consider it more of a counterattack, a defensive assault on behalf of everyone rational, passionate Bears fan who might enjoy the camaraderie of his family and friends at room temperature, with $6 six packs instead of $6 beers and a padded recliner over near-concrete, frozen ass holders.
Allow me to tell you loud and clear, I will be on my couch, wearing a shirt (in spite of the balmy 70 degree temperature in my living room) watching the Bears game the only way you really can watch any football game – ON TV! I’ll be home, cultivating two future Bears’ fans, cheering, yelling and thoroughly enjoying the game in the comfort of my own home.
Now if you are simple enough to attack my preference for watching on TV, let me make some brutally obvious points that standing shirtless in 10 degree temperatures have left too many incapable of grasping. I see the game and you don’t. I can’t tell you how many times I get calls from friends on the way home from a game asking me “what happened on that play?” I tell them of course, because I was able to hear, watch and absorb every second of the action while they were trying to find a bathroom and a beverage. I would personally be too embarrassed as a “real fan” to call a lowly TV viewer for information. On the other hand, you might ask, if I actually saw more of the game, then who is the real fan?
Beyond all the logic and contradictions is the most unmistakable point. We, the TV people, have completely changed the game you are watching in your overpriced, not near a bathroom seat. We see the game so well on TV, that instant replay is now football law. After 30 years of yelling at the TV, “If I can see that, why can’t you?” the NFL caught on and made it the rule. I enjoy replay challenges more than anyone I know, because it is like a 2 minute jury verdict every time, where the official comes to midfield and says, “Again, we thank TV viewers for finally sharing with us their superior view of the game – thanks”
If you are one of the chosen who attend games, but don’t actually think you are the chosen ones, then I wish I could buy you that first overpriced beverage. But I won’t be there to do that, so I’ll make this offer. Call me after the game if you need to know what happened.
Rick's Note: A man can dream, can't he?
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