"When I started working 20+ years ago my boss would buy computer games, copy them, and return them the next day.Through relentless (but goodnatured) pressure he convinced me to do the same. However, like you, I couldn't return them - mostly because of feeling foolish and possibly getting caught. (My boss was barred from Toys 'R Us - no kidding.) So I ended up with many hundreds of dollars worth of unreturned Atari games and told my boss I returned them. I can now return things. But only because my wife was sooo disappointed in me when I couldn't. She had to come with me the first time, though."
--B
"I beat your record. I returned my first gift when I was 48, and I only did it myself because it was from my wife. Don't use my name, I don't want her to know."
--A
"It's not just a gender thing. I'm a woman who also hates returning gifts. I think it's a guilt thing. Can I ask you a personal question? Are you Catholic?"
--J
Rick responds: "I didn't think it was that obvious, but yes I am."
Thank you also to those of you who completed the following phrase. You know you've become Suburban Man, when...
"Your neighbor says hi, and you know his name."
--S
"You start parallel parking your mini-van and you realize this is the first time you've had to do it since you bought the car."
--L
"You tsk tsk a neighbor with a brown lawn."
--T
"Your daughter comes home at 9 and you've already dialed 9-1-..."
--D
"You'll happily meet anyone downtown as long as it's not during the week, and not during the weekend."
--P
"You know the difference between and can give directions to Lake Forest, Lake in the Hills, Lake Zurich, and Fox Lake."
--A
Thanks also to Daily Herald columnist Ted Cox for mentioning my blog in today's Daily Herald. It's in the Suburban Living section. He wrote:
"Producer Rick Kaempfer who worked with Steve Dahl and Garry Meier and came up with many of the parody songs on John Records Landecker's late, lamented morning show on Oldies WJMK 104.3 FM, has started a blog at http://rickkaempfer.blogspot.com. He delves into his radio archives on Thursdays."
Coming this Thursday, I'll feature one of those parody songs. It was inspired by an event that made Elvis Presley spin in his grave. Next week, John Records Landecker himself will be a guest blogger for a day.
