Thursday, December 31, 2020


Mr. Shoe

End of an Era

Wednesday, December 30, 2020

30 Years Ago Today

My marriage proposal to Bridget didn’t go exactly as planned . My buddy Dave and I had an elaborate scheme planned. We bought rings for our respective girlfriends together, and we planned to unveil them simultaneously on New Years Eve as the clock struck Midnight.

But I made a fatal mistake. I told some of my friends at work about my plan, including one of my bosses. I don’t know why I told him–I guess I just couldn’t contain my excitement. Plus, even though Bridget worked in the same office, I figured there was an unwritten code about ruining a surprise of this magnitude.

I was wrong.

The boss told her all about it.

I still have no idea why he would do such a thing, but he did. I’m just happy he did it in front of someone else, because that other person told me that the secret had been revealed. If not for this friendly onlooker, my once-in-a-lifetime opportunity would have become a ho-hum-I-knew-it-was-coming moment.

I decided immediately to scrap the plan.

The first thing I had to do was come up with an alternate date and time. Should I wait until after New Years Eve (which would have crushed Bridget because now she was expecting it), or should I do it before New Years? That seemed like an easy choice, except for one thing. It was already December 30th.

“Very well, then. Tonight it is.”

Without much time to plan, and that night’s arrangements already made (dinner at a neighborhood Chinese restaurant), I really had to get creative. My brainstorm was to propose via fortune cookie. I typed “WILL YOU MARRY ME?” on a tiny scrap of paper about the size of a typical fortune before I left the office, and then as soon as we got to the restaurant, I pretended to go to the bathroom. I circled around to the other side of the restaurant instead, found my waiter, and asked him to insert the note inside a fortune cookie for me before he brought it out to the table.

“I can’t do that,” he said.

“Why not?”

“They come pre-wrapped,” he pointed out.

Now what?

As dinner was ending I still didn’t have a plan. I was considering scrapping the whole thing until after News Years. But when the waiter brought us the fortune cookies, I decided to go for it right then and there. I opened my cookie while she wasn’t paying attention, and slyly made the switch with my little pre-typed fortune.

“What does your say?” she asked me.

“I’m not sure what this means,” I said. I looked at it like it was written in Chinese.

“Let me see it,” she said.

I handed it to her and she stared at it for about three seconds before looking up. I thought she was going to pass out when we met eyes.

“Is this what I think it is?” she asked.

I nodded, and put the ring box on the table.

She started crying even before she opened the box. It looked like happy tears, but I wasn’t 100% sure. I do remember one thing very clearly about that moment. It took her forever to give me an actual answer. I don’t think she ever actually said the word yes, she just nodded through her tears.

It really was a great moment. It ended up being even better than it would have been had I gone through with the original plan. But while I was thinking about that original plan, I remembered that I hadn’t yet told Dave.

When I called him, he wasn’t pleased.

“What am I supposed to do now?” he asked.

“You can still do it on New Years Eve,” I said.

“No way,” he spat. He was ticked. “Now it just looks like I’m copying you.”

“What was I supposed to do?” I asked.

“You could have waited until after New Years,” he said.

Before I could explain my thought process to him, he swore at me, and hung up the phone.

Needless to say, Dave didn’t propose on New Years Eve. Despite already having the ring, he also didn’t propose on Valentine’s Day. He didn’t propose in March. He didn’t propose in April, and he didn’t propose in May.

He didn’t propose until late June, and he was still mad at me when he told me the news.

I guess he eventually forgave me because he asked me to be his best man.

But if you ask him about it even today, he’ll tell you that he was the first groom in history that had to settle for an “OK man.” 

Monday, December 28, 2020

Minutia Men Celebrity Interview--Erik Fellows

Minutia Men--Milk & Moore

Chicago Radio Ratings

These were published this morning by Robert Feder. For a full breakdown of dayparts, click here.

1. WLIT 93.9-FM adult contemporary, 9.5 (4.6)
2. WVAZ 102.7-FM R&B, 8.4 (8.9)
3. WBBM 780-AM/WCFS 105.9-FM all news, 6.8 (6.5)
4. (tie) WBEZ 91.5-FM public radio news talk, 4.4 (4.7); WDRV 97.1-FM classic rock, 4.4 (5.0)
6. WTMX 101.9-FM hot adult contemporary, 4.1 (5.1)
7. (tie) WLS 94.7-FM classic hits, 3.9 (3.7); WOJO 105.1-FM Mexican regional, 3.9 (3.8)
9. WXRT 93.1-FM adult album alternative, 3.5 (3.3)
10. WRME 87.7-FM soft rock oldies, 2.9 (3.1)
11. WGN 720-AM news talk, 2.8 (2.9)
12. WUSN 99.5-FM country, 2.6 (2.4)
13. WKSC 103.5-FM Top 40, 2.5 (2.6)
14. WBMX 104.3-FM classic hip hop, 2.3 (2.4)
15. (tie) WLEY 107.9-FM Mexican regional, 2.2 (2.2); WLS 890-AM news talk, 2.2 (2.5)
17. (tie) WBBM 96.3-FM Top 40, 2.1 (2.1); WPPN 106.7-FM Spanish adult contemporary, 2.1 (2.3)
19. WSHE 100.3-FM adult contemporary, 1.9 (2.1)
20. (tie) WGCI 107.5-FM hip-hop, 1.8 (1.7); WKQX 101.1-FM alternative rock, 1.8 (2.2)
22. (tie) WSCR 670-AM sports talk, 1.7 (2.1); WCHI 95.5-FM rock, 1.7 (2.1)
24. WPWX 92.3-FM hip-hop, 1.4 (1.4)
25. WFMT 98.7-FM classical, 1.2 (1.0)
26. WVIV 93.5-FM Spanish contemporary, 1.0 (0.9)
27. WCPT 820-AM progressive talk, 0.9 (1.2)
28. WMVP 1000-AM sports talk, 0.7 (0.9)
29. (tie) WCCQ 98.3-FM country, 0.6 (0.8); WCKL 97.9-FM contemporary Christian music, 0.6 (0.6)